I picked up the phone and called your punk a**. I waited patiently for your return call. I sat there, and the blackberry made that indiscriminate beep/twirp/twitch sound. I know it can't possibly you. That sound signifies a text. I KNOW I called you. I KNOW you're NOT texting me back. No, you're not crazy. You're definitely not texting back. It was your punk a** texting me back.
I just really don't get it. It could all be so simple, but they rather make it hard. I try and try to understand the rational in returning someone's correspondence via an alternative measure from which they first made contact. Ill give some folks the benefit of the doubt. You're busy, so your texting to say "Hey, I'm busy with something, can I hit you later?". But your punk ass definitely just wrote "wassup". What's up is you acting like a simpleton who doesn't know the cardinal rule: By any means necessary, communication by reciprocal means is not an option, its a requirement.
I know that all people are probably guilty of this, at least once in their lifetime for one reason or another. Maybe you really don't want to talk but don't want to be rude, so you're just going to use the least restrictive means to acknowledge the individual without causing yourself too much pain. But help me understand the man who likes you. Oh, he likes you alright. He says it all the time. And he stays eating your food and using your gas and claiming you in public and all that jazz. But when you call, he texts you back like some dusty trollop he doesn't really want to deal with. Fellas, I know you're probably saying "Its not that deep!" but I'm here to let you know- Oh, it definitely is.
There's something majorly disrespectful about you texting me back after I called you, especially if you don't have to. I can't explain exactly what it is, but just on General Principal, don't play me. The International New Revised Collegiate Manual of General Principal states that, off GP, you're extremely foul for returning my call via text. If I called you, you call me back. If I texted you, you call me back. (Lol, kidding). The point is, maybe as a guy this means nothing to you, but to us you are being all types rude. Allow me to explain.
You don't give the side chick the time of day. If you have time to get back to her you do, if you don't, oh well. And you're definitely not going to be talking to this chick. You are going to use the easiest mode of communication to get to what you want. It is just that simple. If I mean so much to you, why I am being treated like the Tuesday/Friday chick. Am I the side chick? (SIDENOTE: If I am, don't answer that) But if I'm not, do this LITTLE thing that will make a BIG difference. I'm not being complicated, you're being asinine.
I know you don't want to talk on the phone, so the fact that you hit me back so I can hear your voice goes a long way, believe it or not. But please believe booboo, if I CALLED your punk a**, I wanted to TALK to your punk a**. Further, I will over interpret a children's book if you let me. I'm going to take EVERYTHING you do as a sign of something greater. It's in my nature. Don't try to change me by saying "It really doesn't matter." As far as I'm concerned, you texting me can run the Likert scale of "Extremely into You" to "I wish this beezo would stop calling me". And worse, what if it starts to make me feel like you really aren't feeling me. (SIDE NOTE: maybe he really ISN'T feeling you.) But if you are, then pick up that phone and let me know!
Don't silent-speak to me. I am not a deaf mute. I respond to sight AND sound. You being a text whore is giving me all types of mixed signals which I'd rather not interpret. Just follow my lead and save me the confusion. You can tell me you're just not a phone person, but when it comes down to it, I'm not hearing that. What I'm hearing is the deafening silence of my phone NOT ringing and therefore you NOT showing me the kind of love I want to feel. It's actually that simple and that deep. I'm showing you the way I want to be loved and its high time you paid attention.
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