10 Things 2010 Taught me

As we round the corner on the first month of 2011- the year which seems to be on crack if I say so myself- I cannot say that I was not  happy to see 2010 come and go. So many things transpired during that year, I would be amiss to not give my list of 10 things 2010 taught me about myself, other people, and life in general.

1. Don't help people who don't want to be helped. Being the person that I am, it is very easy for me to get sucked into people's drama especially when I have a skill that can be used to intervene. Whether it is saying no to a last minute task, or stepping back and allowing others to learn on their own, 2010 taught me that sometimes the hands-off way really is the best way. Don't be a helping whore. Allow people to help themselves before you always save the day.

2. Friends are the family you get to choose..and just like family they will get on your nerves too. Contrary to what you might believe about your personal set of hooligans, my friends are hands down, without question, the best friends in the world. Over the year of 2010, they were there for me in ways unimaginable, through circumstances unimaginable. However, as good to me as they were, there were also some who worked my last natural nerve. Whether it was hearing them tell me things I didn't want to hear or having to tell them the short and dirty on their own lives, our relationships have been tried and still remain. What I learned over that year was that when it comes to true friends, loving them isn't always easy, but its always worthwhile.

3. Its really not that serious. I've talked about holding unnecessary grudges a couple of times on KFdiaries. And I have to admit, atleast 85% was pure lip-service. I mean, we all know its easy in theory to be the bigger person. But I am here to let you know that ignoring a person is not the same as being over that person. It still takes energy to consciously ignore someone. Its like walking up on someone and saying "This is me ignoring you". Not so effective right? When you are really through with a situation, you care not to care. And in 2010, I learned that when I don't even have the energy to be mad at you anymore, when you don't even deserve my anger, and I am genuinely happy for you in your irrelevance- I have truly moved on.



4. Its ok to say no.  Sometimes, you just have to say no. And you're not always going to be confident when you say it. But its okay to say no even then. Say it often and say it loud. Its much better to do a few things at a high level of excellence, than a lot of things in an average way. Being judicious with your yesses will always have you looking your best.

5. Me time is ok. Another thing Ive talked about, but not always executed very well. And for fear of appearing stand-offish, I have probably over exercised in 2010, just to sort of get the hang of it. Sometimes you have to just turn off the phone and deal with yourself.

6. I can handle a lot more than I've ever given myself credit for. 2010 was full of changes and I made it. Through unlikely circumstances, and with the love and support of good friends and family, I was able to come out stronger, starting 2011 with a new perspective and an even better attitude. However, no matter what your friends and family do to support you, it is really your own personal tenacity that gets you through life's toughest moments. I think when we allow ourselves to be vulnerable and then make ourselves get back up again, we are truly demonstrating the most profound strands of our character. *pats self on back*

7.  I can cook. I have a lot to say about this one and plan to dedicate an entire post to the generation of scallywags who think its cute to not be able to cook. But I would just like to raise my hand and say that I have worked hard to learn a few good things and its making me that much better  a person with every successful dish in 2011.

8. Painting my own nails is one of the most validating, ultra feminine things I can do for myself. There is something quintessentially feminine about having a well manicured hand, and even more so when you take the personal time to treat yourself to your own pampering. With each color that I chose, I feel like painting my nails is a true artistic outlet. Not to mention, men notice. Nothing worse than going out with a chewed back set of nails. It speaks to your attention to detail. And I want it to be said that I value the little things that make a big difference in 2011.

9.  A good cry does the body good.


10. I am fun but I am not for your entertainment. In this day and age, maintaining privacy can be incredibly challenging. And even with my all time high of twitter updates, I have learned that social networking isn't for EVERYTHING. I enjoy having a laugh or two on your given social network, but I have realized that it really isn't for you to share EVERY up and down with EVERYBODY. Particularly the bad things.  Maybe you didn't know this but Facebook friends are just supposed to be there for the good times. Real friends are for hashing out the bad stuff. Whats the point of a sad virtual life? First, I've found that people who are constantly sharing bad stuff going on in their life have a tendency to come off as attention crazed, and two you can easily turn into the boy who cried wolf. When people get so used to hearing bad stuff about you, from you, they don't know when to respond or when their support is actually needed. Even worse, My grandma always said that you should have a little privacy because half the people you tell about something bad in your life don't care, and the other half are glad something happened to you.

Did you learn anything in 2010 that's going to make the difference in 2011?

Share below.