For the love of Self-deprecation, because I've earned it.

If you came to this post expecting some inkling of information about why people constantly do things that they know are "bad" for them with full knowledge or even skewed knowledge of the consequences...you are sorely mistaken. I stand guilty as charged. As a matter of fact, I may stand as the self-proclaimed leader of the hooligans of 20-somethings who are currently out doing whatever-the fword- they want because, well, they can. As of late, a lot of my friends have repeatedly informed me of the apparent fact of my present insanity. Remnants of my recklessness can be found via facebook and twitter updates marking my current disregard for authority and consequence. Even my parental units have acknowledged this new lease on life with a shake of the head and a mutterance  ..."so you're just playing games now,  huh?". Well mom and dad, grandma and grandpa, you're absolutely freaking right. I am doing the ultimate fool. And I'm loving it.

And to you I ask, why not? I mean seriously, what are the 20-somethings for. As I round the corner on my swiftly fleeting years pre-thirtydom, I can reflect on my life and say up to this point, I have done what they wanted me to do.Obviously there are many things our families have envisioned for our lives. But when I think about it, critical to all of the hopes and wishes they may have had for me, there are really just two things standing in the way: Me graduating from college, and doing the aforementioned without penalty or upset (i.e. don't have a baby). Survey says: Check, and DOUBLE Check.

And I hope I'm not stepping on too many toes with that last one, but stomp, stomp. I think most of us can agree with the following experience:  Probably from the time I got my period, the only thing on my  family and extending family's mind (all of them, aunties, uncles, whoever...) was "Please lord don't let this child have a baby." And when they got me off to college and well into matriculation it probably  morphed into a slightly re-qualified request: "Please lord let this child finish college BEFORE she has a baby." Welp Odds, take that.  I am truly footloose and fancy free. Am I saying people who had children early are somehow having a worse or even better experience of life than I?  Nope. Are they failures? Absolutely not. Are they happy? That's for them to judge. But did I win based on the terms and conditions set forth over 10 years ago per the spoken and unspoken plea agreement  made with my pre and post pubescent uterus? HELL to-the YES!

I was talking to one of my many parental figures about some future career plans and what his opinion was on the subject. I told him that I was asking pretty much to see if he would say I sounded crazy or if he thought it was something I could actually do.  His comments were short and sweet. "You graduated from college. You got the masters. You have a good job that you are excelling at. And you have most of your good god-given sense. You don't have any baggage (codeword for baby). For all intents and purposes, You won. Whoever you were fighting, you won. And now you're just standing in the ring asking, "Who wants some?!" So do what you want and be happy."

So to anyone thinking wow, She's doing theeabsolutemost these days- You are damned right. And to anyone considering losing their mind (within reason of course) to you I say, jump. I put in my time. Ive earned the right. I have transitioned from child to adult. So I say yes to staying out all night laughing and drinking with my friends when I know I have work in the morning. I say yes to travel, exploration, and especially mistakes. I say yes to taking a lot of  'me' time. I say yes to Casually dating men I shouldn't, saying rude things to grown men that might get me slapped and maybe even breaking a few hearts. I say yes to eating a pint of ice cream out of the carton while watching The Biggest Loser.  I say yes to telling people the truth. I say yes to lying to myself when its convenient. And until I accept reason not to, I say yes to being the most important person to please in my life.

I have met and exceeding expectations. So in fact, I wouldn't even call this perceptibly questionable behavior  self-deprecating at all. I will call this self-love in its highest form and not take time for a second appraisal. Sometimes taking a little time to NOT take yourself too seriously is the perfect remedy for a mean case of the melancholies and an even better launchpad for productivity and progress. When I am not being so hard on myself I am my most creative. When I allow room for mistakes in my life, I am honestly my most happy. I'm done doing the "right" thing. Taking risks is the most unadulterated indicator of truly living. Besides I have my 30's to sit around and ponder how I survived through such foolishness. For now, Let the good times roll.

All of my Love, R.M.